Help me out here!

[Leadfoot]

Going through the book I stumbled across this and I wanted your input on it.

Bitterly discouraged, he found himself in a strange place, discredited and almost broke. Still physically weak, and sober but a few months, he saw that his predicament was dangerous. He wanted so much to talk with someone, but whom?
One dismal afternoon he paced a hotel lobby wondering how his bill was to be paid. At the end of the room stood a glass covered directory of local churches. Down the lobby a door opened into an attractive bar. He could see the gay crowd inside. In there he would find companionship and release. Unless he took some drinks, he might not have the courage to scrape an acquaintance and would have a lonely week-end.

So, first off I am left with the impression that Bill remained at the hotel for some time after his business venture failed. I have no choice but to believe he had been staying at the hotel the whole time he was in Akron. Then "One dismal afternoon" leaves me with the impression he was still there well afterwards.
Secondly, he was in need of someone to talk to. He saw the crowd in the bar and was concerned that he couldn't go inside at first. Then he considered Ginger Ale

Of course he couldn’t drink, but why not sit hopefully at a table, a bottle of ginger ale before him?

While he sat hopefully at a table. Hoping for what??
Seems at first Bill was just looking for anyone to talk to for any reason. Was he looking to get a little on the side. Who was he looking to talk to, and why?
It appears that helping another alcoholic wasn't his first concern when he was pacing the lobby in the first place.
It was "Fear" again that turned him towards the Church Directory.
Bill didn't express fear since Pg 8

Trembling, I stepped from the hospital a broken man. Fear sobered me for a bit. Then came the insidious insanity of that first drink,

Sounds a lot like Pg 153

Fear gripped him. He was on thin ice. Again it was the old, insidious insanity -- that first drink.

So the question is "Why hadn't Bill left the hotel" and
"Who was Bill looking to talk to at first" Before the fear hit him.

[ribeye]

Bill stayed behind to tie up the loose ends of the business deal that fell through. Some kind of takover venture, I think.

His partners had already left and he was alone that afternoon. I think he was to follow the next day. He was just lonely and felling sorry for himself as far as I can tell.

But that also happens to contain the funniest line of the BB when read at our Tuesday Night Men's Meeting.

"He could see the gay crowd inside. In there he would find companionship and release. "

That never fails to get a chuckle or two from the peanut gallery.

[mcgowdog]

From the Forward to the Second Edition:
"Prior to his journey to Akron, the broker had worked hard with many alcoholics on the theory that only an alcoholic could help an alcoholic, but he had succeeded only in keeping sober himself. The broker had gone to Akron ona business venture which had collapsed, leaving him greatly in fear that he might start drinking again. He suddenly realized that in order to save himself he must carry his message to another alcoholic."

Bill hooked up with Bob, and they worked with drunks and Bill did not return to New York until the Fall of 1935.

A fellowship developed and was unified by the discovered prinicples by which we could live... aka the steps.

Back to Bill's drinking... from Bill's Story;
"Fear sobered me for a bit. Then came the insidious insanity of that first drink, and on Armistice Day 1934, I was off again.

At the hospital I was separated from alcohol for the last time. ... There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then understood Him, to do with me as He would. I placed myself unreservedly under His care and direction. ... I ruthlessly faced my sins and became willing to have my new-found Friend take them away, root and branch. I have not had a drink since.

My schoolmate visited (bah...cough cough SPONSORcough cough) me, and I fully acquainted him with my problems and deficiencies. We made a list (bahcough4thSTEPcough hughgh) of people I had hurt or toward whom I felt resentment. I expressed my entire willingness to approach these individuals (bugh... 8th STEPcough), addmitting my (9thcoughSTEP) wrong. Never was I to be critical of them. I was to right all such matters to the best of my ability. "

Then some 10th and 11th step type stuff was done. This was all done before he had his Blue Light Special.

More from Bill's Story:
"While I lay in the hospital the thought came (came from where? Divinely inspired?) that there were thousands of hopeless alcoholics who might be glad to have what had been so freely given me. Perhaps I could help some of them. They in turn might work with others."

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So the way I see it, Bill was already well recovered from alcoholism when he left the hospital and left on his business trip in Akron. Although he was bummed out and in fear, the obsessoin may have tickled his brain a bit, but he was no more likely to get drunk as the man on the moon. He may have wanted to cheat on Lois or get "gay" in the bar, but not drink.

He was bummed out though, but by the time he reached for the phone, his obsession had already left him. His reaching out to find another alcoholic was his next "inspired" action.

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I wasn't there. I couldn't guarantee this is absolute truth, but it's about the way I think it went down.

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Here's part of a book study I'm doing on Danny's blog;

13-a. What had happened to his business venture in Akron?
The broker had gone to Akron on a business venture which had collapsed
13-b. How did it affect him?
leaving him greatly in fear that he might start drinking again.

15. What did he realize?
He suddenly realized that in order to save himself he must carry his message to another alcoholic.

16. Who did he find as the result of his efforts?
That alcoholic turned out to be the Akron physician.

(P) 17-a. What had the doctor done to try to whip his drinking problem?
This physician had repeatedly tried spiritual means to resolve his alcoholic dilemma
17-b. Had it worked?
But had failed

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So, my take on this is this; Just because Bill was in fear he might drink does not mean that he would have drank, even if he could. He had fear, but this was because he does not yet have faith.

He seemed to stay sober on helping other drunks. But what was backing him was that he did a set of steps and got a Spiritual Experience prior to working with other drunks. How would he know that he would never drink again... even if he would have wanted to? Being human, he had no faith yet. Somehow, he was missing a key piece to the puzzle in helping other drunks to recover... as he wasn't presenting to them both the problem as experienced by his own drinking and the solution.

But thank God he was still driven to try this "bringing the 'Problem' to another alcoholic who already has tried the 'Solution', but doesn't have the essential understanding of the 'Problem' combined with the 'Solution.'"

Thus the altruistic movement that we are all familiar with today.